An erogenous zone is an area of the human body with heightened sensitivity, usually from an increased number of sense receptors, the stimulation of which will often cause a sexual response. The sexual response may be as extreme as an orgasm or it might just be an increase in sexual hormones.
Sounds simple doesn’t it? Like we all have these little buttons on our body that, if manipulated correctly, will cause orgasms. But we all know that’s wrong don’t we? I mean, if you’re not in the mood, or something’s preventing you from getting in the mood, no amount of stimulation on any area of your body is going to help.
For example, imagine you’re on a date with a five hundred pound person who hasn’t bathed in a month, considers foreplay to be saying “so, we gonna do it?” and has breath that would gag a vulture. No matter how deftly that person manipulates any or all of your erogenous zones it’s probably unlikely that you’ll be turned on or achieve anything like an orgasm. Unless that’s your fetish of course.
So, the biggest, most important erogenous zone is the brain. It’s so important, in fact, that it’s getting several other chapters to itself. Things like setting the mood, engaging conversation and active listening, are methods of “tickling” your partner’s brain and require much more in depth coverage than just a few paragraphs in this chapter. Also, it never hurts to bathe regularly, keep yourself fit, brush your teeth and generally be considerate and thoughtful, you don’t want to be that guy (or gal) I just described. Seriously, how many people could possibly have that fetish?
The most obvious erogenous zones are our genitalia, and I ‘ve already described a few different techniques for manipulating them in the chapter on Oral sex, I’ll describe more later on when we get to Sexual positions but, for now, let’s assume that focusing on your partner’s genitalia, to the exclusion of everything else, is the equivalent of licking the icing off the cake and tossing out the rest. The icing may be the sweetest, it may be your favorite part, but the icing alone just isn’t very filling, you’d be missing out on the rich, velvety cake, the feel of it in your mouth and that delicious moment you wash it down with a cool, refreshing sip of milk.
The second most obvious erogenous zone would be the nipples, on women especially but men have increased sensitivity as well. There is a specific reason for this and it involves breast feeding so I won’t get into it. The nipples are highly sensitive so go easy on them at first, brush them lightly, or lick them, make circular motions with your fingers until the areola (the skin around the nipple itself) crinkles up. Try pinching them, even a little sucking and nibbling may be advantageous. The key here is to gauge your partner’s reactions and have them direct you in your efforts until you can learn how to gauge what they like and when. The areola’s also have heightened sensitivity.
The breast itself is also an erogenous zone but it contains a delicate and sensitive gland so you want to go easy on it, don’t grab it or mash it around. Like the testicles the mammary gland needs to be cared for, not abused, or you’ll cause pain and possible complications. Unless that’s their fetish, of course, abusing either breasts or testicles will be a real mood killer. Try caressing the breast, cupping it while tickling the nipples, even kissing around it’s surface. The underside of the breast, the cleavage (the area between the breasts) and the sides of the breasts are also excellent places to slide your fingertips, lips and nose. Yes, your nose, anything that can be used to stimulate an erogenous zone will promote an orgasm or just plain, old good sex.
Lips, ears and just behind the ears, the back of the neck, belly and the interior of the thighs are wonderful places to kiss or brush your lips or fingertips. Especially during intercourse these actions can heighten your partner’s enjoyment and will make them feel especially sexy. By spending effort to caress and “appreciate” their whole body you’ll be making it clear that they are more than just a vagina or a penis to get you off, they’ll feel sexier because you are so obviously appreciating the whole of them.
During foreplay kissing the neck, nibbling lightly on the earlobe, running your fingertips or palms along their belly and inner thighs will bring about a much stronger sexual desire in both your partner and you. The back of the knee, the lower curve of the back and the gluteal region (butt) are also excellent areas for caressing, kissing and fondling. The butt is a fairly sturdy piece of anatomy so you can put some more effort into squeezing, rotating and even, if they like it, spanking them.
The key to working the erogenous zones is to keep moving to different regions, prolonged fondling in any given area will start to detract from the sensations you’re producing. When coupled with intercourse you’ll discover that your partner’s sexual response is heightened, they’ll be producing more sex hormones; making them hornier and, as a result, they’ll put out more pheromones which will make you hornier. Once you get them to a higher hormonal state it will be easier to give them orgasms and more of their body will have heightened sensitivity until every part of them, from their toes to the tips of their hair feels like a tingling, electrically charged sex organ.
Once a woman’s vagina becomes too sore to continue having intercourse, as long as you’ve begun to overload her brain with sex hormones, she can have orgasms by having other erogenous zones manipulated. I’ve given women orgasms by sucking on their nipples. The key is to do it when their brains are just floating in hormones and the key to making that happen is to give them as many orgasms as they can possibly handle.
Watch some porn, critically, and you’ll notice that erogenous are rarely, if ever, utilized and if they are it’s usually incorrectly, achieving the exact opposite effect. This is part of the reason you almost never see female orgasms in professional pornography. Most women are capable of having multiple orgasms, they should be having orgasms aplenty versus the male’s one and, if you are both open and honest with each other, helping each other be better lovers, you can easily achieve this. Your partner will appreciate your openness and honesty and will feel that you appreciate them as a person enough to want to maximize their pleasure.
Talk about tickling someone’s brain!